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Welcome to P.O.R.N!!!!

February 6, 2011

Why, hello!!! It’s SOOOOOO nice to meet you! My name’s Emily, and I just know we’re going to be the best of friends!!! I’ll be like “Here’s a new post for you!” and you’ll be like “OMG that was so wonderful to read, I really enjoyed that!” and I’ll be like, “OMG REALLY?!?! Lemme write you ANOTHER ONE!!!” And before you know it, you’ll be addicted, and I’ll be super rich and famous. Like a drug dealer, only BETTER. Cuz how many drug dealers do YOU know that get to brag about what they do to the world at large? I only know one, but he got caught. By the po-pos. That means he’s in jail now. And do you know what they eat in jail? Meat that was delivered as liquid. Ew. Noooo thanks. I choose blogger. And therefore, I win. And you do too. Because, since I chose to be a blogger, you totes don’t have to lose your hair and teeth to crack.


We win so much.


Even Bertie's ecstatic!!!



2 Comments leave one →
  1. Deborah permalink
    March 7, 2011 5:53 am

    You’re very talented and funny and original. I subscribed. I hope some publishing magnate discovers you so you can continue to fund your sewing habit.

    • March 7, 2011 9:58 am

      If only!!! That’s definitely my dream job, Deborah… Cross your fingers for me! 😉 (PS: I *really* appreciate your compliment – it’s not everyday a girl hears something like that. Thanks!)

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