Vacation: Part Two

So apparently our cottage in Cape Cod was so cheap for a reason. And that reason was sand flea season.

 
 

They started out just being an annoyance on the beach, but once they realized there was fresh meat just yards away from the tide, they made their way into our cottage. By the middle of the week, they were interrupting my sleep. I’d wake up to tiny attacks on my bare legs under the covers and flail my legs around like crazy til they slowed down on their feasting.

 
 

But Friday night became an all out war. I’d just closed my eyes when a full on coordinated attack began.

 
 

 
 

 
 

 
 
It continued all night long, so by 3am I couldn’t stand it one moment longer. I threw back my covers, ready to scratch them all to smitherines, only to discover that it was not the sand fleas keeping me awake at all.

 
 

 
 
Now, I rather adore crickets, but not when they’re in my bed jumping around on my legs. So I scooped him up and sat him outside the window faster than you can say “Jiminy.”

 
 
With the issue resolved, I was finally able to get some sleep.

 
 
Saturday night was our last night, so we packed up everything but the linens and went to bed early. Yet again, I tossed and turned because every little nerve twitch I felt was definitely a whole family of crickets tickling my legs and laughing manically. But in order to maintain sanity and not go totally paranoid, I wouldn’t let myself keep lifting the covers to scan every nook and cranny. I told myself to ignore the feeling in my legs and sleep for goodness’ sake because we had twelve hours of driving to do the next day.

 
 
And eventually I did get my sleep, but the next morning my legs looked like a family of crickets had indeed been tormenting them. Regardless, I grabbed the towels from the bathroom while my mom stripped the beds, and once we’d mopped and swept, we were on our way from our favorite little cottage on the beach.
 
 

During breakfast at Dunkin Donuts, my mom suppressed a cackle and asked me how I’d slept. Thinking she was about to tease me about the cricket again, I gave her my signature look and went on eating.

 
 

She burst out laughing for a good while.

 
 

Once she controlled herself, she informed me that when she had stripped my sheets that morning, she’d found Jiminy’s friend: